Do you have a relative that's a bit off-the-wall? An aunt, cousin, brother or who-ever that you keep away from because...well they are unpredictable? This role is played by one of my uncles. He is a good person, who will give you the shirt off his back---but I won't let him drive me anywhere---I'd rather pay a car service than ride with him. Why...? Because my uncle refuses to admit that he needs glasses and makes up his own driving rules.
This was illustrated to me and two of my cousins in the one and only time that I rode in his car. We were attending a party and had to go by train to another town. Now...since that party house was really far from the station, somebody had to pick us up from the station--and my uncle volunteered. I had never been in a car with him, so I just thought that OK this was going to be an uneventful 15-minute ride from the station to the house. But---no...it turned into what seemed like the longest ride of my life.
There we were-- waiting for him in front of the station, which is at ground level, we see his car and start waving--he drives by--we start waving like crazy and calling him out--finally, after passing us by, he comes back and recognizes us. We get in the car with me in the front and my two cousins in the back. So I ask him, if he knows how to get back to house--of course I do! he answers somewhat annoyed--so I said nothing more.
We were on this very wide, eight-lanes highway, with four lanes in one direction, and four lanes in the other. I notice that my uncle is squinting his eyes--and I ask him if he needs glasses---of course not! he says. So I ask him--as I see him making moves to change lanes--what are you doing..? He tell me--oh I'm headed for the exit ramp. I look and see a retaining wall getting closer and closer to us---Excuse me...I tell him but you are NOT headed towards an exit---you are going to crash the car against that wall! Oh he says, squinting again, --it must be the one after the next overpass. So I tell him that I will be the co-pilot and tell him when our exit comes up.
The exit was coming up in one mile so I told him to start changing lanes--but no---he got distracted and missed the exit. No biggie says he--I will fix that--and then proceeds to make a U-turn in the middle of the highway with cars zooming by us at over 70 miles an hour! All three of us (me and my cousins) just gave a long heartfelt scream! Telling him that he was crazy--and to please stop driving like a maniac! He just says that we are a bunch of sissies! To stop screaming--we are distracting him---what..? we say, are you insane....? Well, he gets to the exit, on this very busy road and just as we get on the exit ramp--his car gives out and the engine dies. So there we are stuck on the exit ramp--with drivers behind us, cursing us out and telling us to move it--and my "dear" uncle is there calm as anything saying, oh don't worry--this happens all the time, once the engines cools off a bit it will get going again. Me and my cousins--at this point--are seriously thinking of maybe getting out of the car and just walk to the house.
And just as we were getting ready get out of the car-- it comes back to life. There! says my uncle triumphantly..see..good as ever! and cheerfully gets back in the car and drives off the exit ramp. By this time we are hiding our faces and sliding low in the car so that nobody sees us with this crazy person.
We finally get to the house for the party--about 3 hours late. A 15-minute trip had turned into a nightmare ride. The worst part was that my uncle then comes to us, as if nothing had happened, and offers to drive us back to the station once the party is over. Suffice it to say---that we declined his offer.
